Descending Road - THE RED LISTS by Dana W. Paxson

THE RED LISTS

2414 CE

Allan‘s apartment was cramped but well-furnished. Miriam had finished her shift. Her resolve was wavering. Tonight they sat on his couch and fought over the Hau Ren offer.

“Allan,” Miriam said, holding up both hands facing him, “I can’t just leave my family behind! My friends, my career, everything I’ve worked for. I can’t!”

He reared back. “Why not? Over and over you’ve complained about raising children in this mess, and here’s a chance to get out, and you don’t want it. That’s stupid.”

“No! It’s more stupid to abandon your whole family forever. I won’t do that. They’d be devastated.” She turned to look away from him.

“You like staying and watching them and your friends get shot? Could you save Edward?”

She turned on him and spat, “You shit. Don’t you bring that up. I told you how I felt about losing him. You want to twist the knife again?” She stood up. “Forget all this. I’m going home.”

Allan didn’t flinch. “I would have saved Edward just the way I saved you today, if I could have. I loved him like my own brothers, even more.” He looked down at the dust-stained rug.

“So you want to hurt me? Why? Do you like to abuse me?”

He looked up at her. “God, no. Can’t I get you to see how bad this place is, every day? And getting worse? Why do you keep pretending it’s okay, it’ll get better? Damn it, it’s like drowning an inch at a time.”

She looked out his front window. Her own building was two towers away; beyond that lay Cape Town, its many thin spires sparkling with lights blurred in the dirty air. As she watched, whole sectors of the city vanished into blackness one by one as the power went out again.

“It’s bad,” she finally admitted, “But we could go to Buenos Aires. That’s where Diallo and Fereshti went. We could--“

“It’s worse there than here, now. Didn’t you read this morning’s red lists?” The red lists were the world-published barometers of civil unrest across the globe, naming the hot spots, the numbers of disnamed, cleansed, and murdered, the buildings and towns destroyed, the numbers of sick and wounded, the ratings of infrastructure losses.

Miriam thrust away her fear for her friends, for the moment. “It’s got to be better somewhere. Allan, please.”

“It isn’t better on this planet. If you want better, try Titan Five.”

“You’re playing around! T-Five’s just the rich and the robots, sitting in their cozy little bubbles forever. Be serious, Allan, this matters to me. It’s like you don’t care, you just take these shots at me.”

He looked down. “It’s the only way I can get through to you, Miriam. I want this trip. I don’t see any place on this planet that’s good for us. The global cleanup is only ten years old, and yesterday the UN said it’ll take another ninety. The Northern Hemisphere is still mostly poisoned. All the people who moved south have made everyplace else a living hell, just like here.”

“So you suggested Titan.”

“That was just to underline the problem.”

“I understand the god-damn problem, Allan. I’m out there living it.”

“Yeah, you understand it, but you won’t do anything to save yourself. You just watch it get worse, and you keep inventing excuses to make the next murder not push you over the line.”

“Allan, shut up.”

“See? Here we are again. And I get to watch you do this.”

“Allan, shut up!”

“Fine.”

“I’m going home.”

“Please think about it and let me know, okay? I’ll take you home.”

“No. Leave me alone. I want to think by myself.”

“Miriam, the streets–“

“I don’t need you to save me every time. I’ll get John to taxi me over.”

“All right.”

She left.

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	THE RED LISTS 2414 CE Allan‘s apartment was cramped but well-furnished. Miriam had finished her shift. Her resolve was wavering. Tonight they sat on his couch and fought over the Hau Ren offer. “Allan,” Miriam said, holding up both hands facing him, “I can’t just leave my family behind! My friends, my career, everything I’ve worked for. I can’t!” He reared back. “Why not? Over and over you’ve complained about raising children in this mess, and here’s a chance to get out, and you don’t want it. That’s stupid.” “No! It’s more stupid to abandon your whole family forever. I won’t do that. They’d be devastated.” She turned to look away from him. “You like staying and watching them and your friends get shot? Could you save Edward?” She turned on him and spat, “You shit. Don’t you bring that up. I told you how I felt about losing him. You want to twist the knife again?” She stood up. “Forget all this. I’m going home.” Allan didn’t flinch. “I would have saved Edward just the way I saved you today, if I could have. I loved him like my own brothers, even more.” He looked down at the dust-stained rug. “So you want to hurt me? Why? Do you like to abuse me?” He looked up at her. “God, no. Can’t I get you to see how bad this place is, every day? And getting worse? Why do you keep pretending it’s okay, it’ll get better? Damn it, it’s like drowning an inch at a time.” She looked out his front window. Her own building was two towers away; beyond that lay Cape Town, its many thin spires sparkling with lights blurred in the dirty air. As she watched, whole sectors of the city vanished into blackness one by one as the power went out again. “It’s bad,” she finally admitted, “But we could go to Buenos Aires. That’s where Diallo and Fereshti went. We could--“ “It’s worse there than here, now. Didn’t you read this morning’s red lists?” The red lists were the world-published barometers of civil unrest across the globe, naming the hot spots, the numbers of disnamed, cleansed, and murdered, the buildings and towns destroyed, the numbers of sick and wounded, the ratings of infrastructure losses. Miriam thrust away her fear for her friends, for the moment. “It’s got to be better somewhere. Allan, please.” “It isn’t better on this planet. If you want better, try Titan Five.” “You’re playing around! T-Five’s just the rich and the robots, sitting in their cozy little bubbles forever. Be serious, Allan, this matters to me. It’s like you don’t care, you just take these shots at me.” He looked down. “It’s the only way I can get through to you, Miriam. I want this trip. I don’t see any place on this planet that’s good for us. The global cleanup is only ten years old, and yesterday the UN said it’ll take another ninety. The Northern Hemisphere is still mostly poisoned. All the people who moved south have made everyplace else a living hell, just like here.” “So you suggested Titan.” “That was just to underline the problem.” “I understand the god-damn problem, Allan. I’m out there living it.” “Yeah, you understand it, but you won’t do anything to save yourself. You just watch it get worse, and you keep inventing excuses to make the next murder not push you over the line.” “Allan, shut up.” “See? Here we are again. And I get to watch you do this.” “Allan, shut up!” “Fine.” “I’m going home.” “Please think about it and let me know, okay? I’ll take you home.” “No. Leave me alone. I want to think by myself.” “Miriam, the streets–“ “I don’t need you to save me every time. I’ll get John to taxi me over.” “All right.” She left.